@Rosie – you know you’re fucked when a kebab won’t even stay down. That is impressive. I’m impressed.

The time I vomited in a taxi before that I managed to project everything out the window, leaving a very graceful streak of vodka and kebab and bile across the side of the taxi, and a veritable Hansel-and-Gretel trail home.

@passerby – actually, I did not vom that night. But I was on the way home from shtbox so I must have looked pretty sketchy.

I get the same thing with cabcharge since it’s a card like credit. Most cabbies feign ignorance or pretend their machine isn’t working. So we do a bit of a song and dance until I make them do it manually with carbon paper and the clacky-clack hard plastic copy device

“Taxis drivers are often pea-brained dick holes with all the wit and charm of Oscar Wilde’s discarded leather condom collection; people who will basically rape you with the fare to the Hills, and we can’t help that – only Darwinian selection over millenia will cure that ill and wipe the cancer of these people from the bunghole of the Earth – but for everything else, there’s Mastercard ™”

I don’t know, I haven’t really done an awful lot of work in the advertising world – not really my area, as such.