Tales from Kuwait
I once lived with a guy who grew up in Kuwait and would talk about his childhood late at night when he was drunk.
One evening, a few of us gathered as he described a horrifying incident in which his father had beaten him severely for leaving a smudge on his black Mercedes.
“I don’t understand, why did he hit you?” I asked, shocked by the scale of such a beating.
“Well I had to clean his cars every week, and if they weren’t spotless by dinner, I got into big trouble,” he replied.
“That’s awful,” I commented.
“It’s okay, I got him back,” he said with a smile.
“What did you do?” my friend asked, “Did you scratch his car or something?”
“No,” he said, glancing around the room mischievously. “I killed his dog.”
Roughly eight seconds of complete silence passed, before I cleared my throat and asked, “How?”
“Well,” my housemate continued, “I waited until he went to work, and then I locked his dog inside the Merc. By the time my dad finished his shift, that dog was swollen up like a motherfucking beach ball!!”
Then he roared with laughter. My friend, an avid lover of animals, picked up her bag and left immediately, while I busied myself clearing away our empty glasses.
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11 Responses to “Tales from Kuwait”
What is it with you and dog murderers?
What kind of dog was it?
@Jayphen – well the first one was a sociopath, the second was just Arabic.
@Dave – I’m not sure, to be honest. From memory, it may have been a german shepherd, but I wouldn’t put money on that.
Would it have swelled up like a beach ball? Is that what happens? I want some mythbusters on this.
@ambrosemrosie – apparently the intense heat causes dead bodies to swell.
@Annik … like – like when you bake a cake?
@ambrosemrosie – it is exactly like when you bake a cake. As far as scientists are aware, there’s no actual anatomical difference.
@Annik. Okay, dog=cake. I have learned something new today
Knowing what kind of dog it may have been I’m actually slightly more disturbed.
Wow thats good English, Dave.
@Dave – it should be “that’s” with an apostrophe.
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