At the terracotta warriors exhibition…
Mum: They say that every warrior was crafted to look like an actual living soldier at the time. Each statue is unique.
Mum: Well, who knows.. They’re Chinese so they all look the same anyway.
After a trip to Guatemala…
Mum: The toilets over there were awful. The only decent one I found was a disabled cubicle at a restaurant. It had better toilet paper.
Me: That’s weird.
Mum: I know, why bother? It’s not like they can feel the difference.
Upon hearing the news that my cousin and her girlfriend were engaged…
Mum: To do what?